relationship issues

The Perfect ‘Imperfect’ Relationship

I don’t believe in soul mates. That doesn’t mean I don’t believe in true love or the idea that two people can find each other and be truly happy together for the rest of their lives. What I reject, rather, is the belief that there is only one person in the world for us, and… Read more »

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One Surprising Reason We Sabotage Love

In a previous blog, I talked about how studies are now showing that it is possible for people to stay in love long-term. Yet, it’s been said that over 85 percent of couples will call it quits. According to data collected by WotWentWrong, an app that tracks why people break up, the most common reason… Read more »

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5 Simple Steps to End Any Fight

Fighting with a partner is one of those unpleasant parts of a relationship that we wish wouldn’t happen. But what if it was also life-threatening? A Brigham Young University study, tracing couples over two decades, found that more arguments correlated with poorer health and concluded that couples who don’t argue live longer. While a happy relationship… Read more »

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5 Things to Try Before You Give Up on Your Relationship

It’s a pretty common consensus that love takes work. Yet, 80 percent of Americans under 30 believe in a soulmate, the idea that there is one perfect person out there just waiting to be found. Even the expression “falling in love” makes it sound like love is out of our hands — that it just happens… Read more »

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Why Do So Many People Respond Negatively to Being Loved?

Love — kindness, affection, sensitive attunement, respect, companionship — is not only difficult to find, but is even more challenging for many people to accept and tolerate.  In my work with individuals and couples, I have observed countless examples of people reacting angrily when loving responses were directed toward them. One man felt a flash… Read more »

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Why Am I Still Single? 8 Reasons People Often Stay Single

Clearly, some people are single because they choose to be. They are simply not interested in being in a serious relationship at this time in their life. Others are single due to the circumstances of their lives. They may have just gotten out of a meaningful relationship or have dated relentlessly and just haven’t found… Read more »

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How You Know When To Let a Friend Go

It was the night of my 23rd birthday when the friendship I had come to call my “best” quickly dissipated.  The night had spiraled out of control and I decided by the end of it that despite 10 years of friendship, we both needed to find happiness elsewhere.  Losing such a longtime friend was one… Read more »

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Toxic Relationships

Most people question, at one point or another, am I in a healthy relationship? Is my partner right for me? Is our fighting normal? Are we really happy together? The answer is unique to the relationship, but one thing is almost always universally true: every couple goes through tough times. Even the best of matches… Read more »

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Are You in an Unhealthy Relationship?

Every couple goes through rough patches. Yet, when these patches stretch out into long-term struggles, how can we tell if the relationship is worth salvaging? Is it our own shortcomings and defenses that have caused us to fall out of love, or are we actually in an unhealthy relationship? Here are some signs to look… Read more »

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The Fantasy Bond: A substitute for a truly loving relationship

Defenses formed in childhood hurt adult relationships. Most people have fears of intimacy and are self-protective and at the same time are terrified of being alone. Their solution to their emotional dilemma is to form a fantasy bond. This illusion of connection and closeness allows them to maintain an imagination of love and loving while… Read more »

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