Search Results for: critical inner voice

Why Do We Trigger Each Other in Close Relationships?

…nsider that can help us understand and overcome our triggers: Our Critical Inner Voice When we feel triggered by our partner, several things may be going on. For starters, we usually aren’t just dealing with what the other person is saying or doing, but whatever we are telling ourselves about what they are saying or doing. We all have a “critical inner voice” that coaches us about ourselves and others. This inner critic is formed out of negative e…

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narcissist's mind

What Really Goes On in the Mind of a Narcissist?

…and I would argue that they are also the handiwork of a person’s “critical inner voice.” For many years, I’ve discussed the critical inner voice, a concept developed by my father, Dr. Robert Firestone, as a destructive thought process formed from hurtful experiences that shaped our sense of self, others, and the world around us. This cruel internal coach controls the negative conversation and commentary that goes on inside our own mind. While for…

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Voice Therapy

…d/or others and verbalizing them in the second person dialogue format, as “voices” The process of verbalizing voices can be approached either intellectually as a primarily cognitive technique or more dramatically using cathartic methods. In the latter, particular emphasis is placed on the release of affect accompanying the expression of the voice attacks. The majority of clients seem to naturally adopt an emotional style of expression when articul…

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The Inner Voice that Drives Suicide

…my dissertation on suicide, I have learned a great deal about the critical inner voices that drive a person toward suicide. In my years of experience publishing books and articles, producing films and creating assessment scales on suicide, what has fascinated me the most is the consistent finding of the role of the destructive inner voice in suicide. This voice drives suicidal tendencies, deceptively convincing people that it is better to end thei…

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The Scientific Approach to Keeping New Year’s Resolutions

…o determine if we’re ready to make a change. 2. Get ahold of your critical inner voice One of the reasons it’s such a challenge to stick with any step we’re taking toward our goals is that we all have an inner critic driving a wedge between where we’re at and where we want to be. Like a cruel coach, this voice in our heads serves to demoralize, demean, and undermine us, and it tends to get a lot louder when we attempt to make a change. For example…

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Leaving Your Childhood Behind to Become a Better Parent

…elf-hating or self-denying? Are we limited by an inner critic or “critical inner voice” that we’ve internalized? What are the ways we hurt ourselves in our goals or interpersonal relationships? As we get to know our true selves, we can differentiate from undesirable qualities from our past. We can make conscious choices as parents that help us to offer our children the emotional stability and support they need to be strong and resilient. In this p…

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How to Overcome the Fear of Failure

…negative thoughts toward ourselves and others we refer to as the “critical inner voice.” The inner voice undermines us and limits our capacity to pursue and accomplish the things we want in life. Whenever we face challenges or go after a dream, this inner critic is there to hold us back and scare us with possibilities of failure. It encourages us to be self-protective and not put ourselves out there or take chances. Though everyone is faced with s…

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5 Truths about Anxiety to Help You Stay Present

…be elevated by experiences that remind us of old ways we felt or “critical inner voices” we have about ourselves or our circumstances. This is one of the main reasons that making sense of our past can be a powerful tool to understanding and overcoming anxiety in the present. It may seem like our stress about work or our worries about our relationship are entirely based on current conditions, but the ways we experience, react, feel, and torture our…

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finding love

Finding Love: Empowering Tools to Help You Find the Relationship You Want

…s what both Drs. Robert and Lisa Firestone often refer to as the “critical inner voice.” People preserve their defenses and their fears by maintaining an old, negative image of themselves, in which they essentially see themselves as unlovable or unable to find a loving relationship. As Dr. Lisa Firestone said, “We all possess ‘critical inner voices’ that tell us we are too fat, too ugly, too old or too different. When we listen to these “voices,”…

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Are You Setting Yourself Up For Failure?

…ntrol. Hmmm, maybe that’s not it. I think the problem is that our critical inner voice gets involved and, without our even realizing it, derails us from succeeding in reaching our objectives. The ‘voice’ is tricky; it can get involved when we’re establishing our goals and it can influence us to ignore them. 1. When we’re creating our resolutions, we have to make sure they’re not coming from the voice of our inner critic. Take the three most popula…

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