Search Results for: critical inner voice

7 Behaviors That Ruin a Relationship

…ship. However, there’s often also a lot of negative self-talk or “critical inner voices” that discourage us from pursuing our sexuality. It’s important to filter out the negative messages and stay in touch with this vital part of ourselves and our partner. Ideally, we would strive to stay in touch with our own wanting feelings and with those of our partner. There would be a give and take, with real contact being made, that sparks intimate and lovi…

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Why Do We Keep Ending Up in the Same Kinds of Relationships? The Answer Lies in Our Attachment Styles

…man who wanted a loving partner, but always ended up with someone who was critical and rejecting. He recognized that he developed anxious attachment patterns as a child. His mother was inconsistent: at times caring and nurturing, but mostly critical and punishing. This left him confused and desperate toward her. He also became aware that in his romantic relationships, he had an anxious preoccupied attachment style. He understood how he had subcon…

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Empowering Strategies to Fight Depression

…ymptoms of depression. She will introduce a concept known as the “critical inner voice,” an internal enemy we all possess that fuels symptoms of depression and often discourages those suffering from engaging in the very behaviors that could help them feel better. Learning how to challenge this inner enemy and take the actions that can strengthen one’s real sense of self provides powerful tools for those fighting to overcome depression.   There are…

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Fantasy Bond, Intimacy problems, relationship advice

Why the Spark Fades in a Relationship

…uly know your partner, rather than seeing him or her through a negative or critical lens. When we get into the habit of swallowing our feelings and turning against our partner rather than stating how we feel, we are skating on thin ice. Even when we start to feel close, we will often be quick to become critical the minute our partner does something that rubs us the wrong way. When we feel free to directly say the things that annoy or anger us, we…

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The Self Under Siege: A New Model of Differentiation

…at involves: 1. Breaking with internalized thought processes, that is, the critical, hostile attitudes toward self and others. 2. Altering the negative personality traits in oneself that represent an incorporation of the aversive traits of one’s parents. 3. Identifying and relinquishing patterns of defense formed as an adaptation to painful events in one’s childhood. 4. Developing one’s own values, ideals, and beliefs rather than automatically acc…

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How to Stop Sabotaging Yourself

    In this Webinar: Each of us has an “inner critic” judging our every action and instructing us on how to live our lives. But how much are we letting this inner critic control us and sabotage our goals? Are we living the lives we were destined to live or are we living someone else’s life? Are our actions based on what we really feel and believe or on negative programming from our past? This Webinar with Dr. Lisa Firestone can help individuals s…

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Suicide Prevention

…nd Love in Intimate Relationships (APA Books, 2006), Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice (New Harbinger, 2002), and Creating a Life of Meaning and Compassion: The Wisdom of Psychotherapy (APA Books, 2003). An accomplished and much requested lecturer, she represents the Glendon Association at national and international conferences in the areas of suicide assessment and prevention, parenting, couple relations and Voice Therapy. Additionally, in conjun…

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Can We Change in Our Relationships?

…are of a destructive, self-limiting thought process known as the “critical inner voice.” This voice is both shaped by and fuels our negative ideas about ourselves and relationships in general, reinforcing old messages like: “You are undeserving of love.” “You can’t trust him; he’ll leave you.” “She doesn’t really care about you. No one does.” As we notice it, we can start to challenge this “voice” and its intrusion on our relationships. Noticing p…

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Daily Self Portrait: Fashion is More than What You Wear

…self-portrait of personal style. Superstar Beyoncé is known for her golden voice. But she is almost as well known for her form-fitting clothes and confident embrace of a lush figure. She is on a mission in her career that goes beyond the joys of fame, fortune and song. She recently told Piers Morgan on his show that her performances are underwritten first and foremost with the aspiration and goal to empower women. “I feel like a woman,” she emphat…

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Attachment, Trauma and Dissociation: An Interview with Dr. Christine Courtois

…ment and dissociation. Dr. Courtois discusses the concept of the ‘Critical Inner Voice’ and Voice Therapy. She addresses how families can be a source of trauma, citing that statistically speaking “the most dangerous people to children are their intimates.” Dr. Courtois places an important emphasis on the extent to which individuals often minimize complex trauma, essentially saying of their abuse “Aw, it wasn’t so bad.” She discusses trauma bonding…

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