…ishing and self-punishing components of the fantasy bond. Read more in Dr. Robert Firestone’s new book: The Enemy Within: Separation Theory and Voice Therapy References Jacobson (2009). Considering Interactions between Genes, Environment, Biology, and Social Context. Psychological Science Agenda. Siegel, D. & Hartzell, M. (2003). Parenting from the Inside Out. New York: Jeremy P. Tarcher Silverman, L. & Weinberger, J. (1985). Mommy and I Are One:…
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…developing a mature approach to life and move toward a more satisfying and freer existence. This subject will be addressed in my next blog. Learn about Dr. Robert Firestone’s book The Self under Siege: A Therapeutic Model for Differentiation…
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…rpt from Compassionate Child-Rearing: An In-Depth Approach to Parenting by Robert Firestone, Ph.D. It is vital for parents to respond as real people to their children, rather than role-playing or acting patronizing, strategic, or phony in their interactions with them. It is impossible for parents to “learn how to talk to their children” in a manner that is contrary to their underlying attitudes or way of being. Indeed, any technique, attitude, or…
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Robert W. Firestone, Ph.D. – This eye-opening book introduces the theory and underlying dynamics involved in family relationships. The author helps explain how even well-intentioned parents unwittingly injure their children’s self-esteem and psychological functioning based on their own childhood defenses and self-destructive tendencies. By recognizing their own early life experiences and the internalized defenses they developed as a result, paren…
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…ship to lose its sizzle? One explanation, which I (along with psychologist Robert W. Firestone) wrote about in our book Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice is that “The single most important factor that contributes to the deterioration of love, friendship and sexuality in a relationship is the formation of a fantasy bond. The fantasy bond is an illusion of connection or imagined fusion with another person that provides an individual with a false sen…
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Robert W. Firestone, Ph.D. – This book offers a consistently developed set of hypotheses centering around the concept of the “fantasy bond,” an illusion of connection originally formed with the mother/ primary caretaker and later with significant others in the individual’s environment. Based on 28 years of research into the problem of resistance, this book offers a consistently developed set of hypotheses centering around the concept of the “fant…
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…py, a therapeutic approach developed by my father, psychologist and author Robert Firestone, therapists help clients pinpoint environmental triggers that precipitate the painful emotions and negative thought patterns, which, in turn, influence them to engage in addictive behaviors. By further encouraging the pursuit of genuine wants, desires, and goals, therapists strengthen clients’ real selves, a process that enables them to achieve freedom from…
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…is actually the voice of a well-hidden enemy within, what psychologist Dr. Robert Firestone refers to as the critical inner voice. Internalized early in live, this inner voice functions like an over-disciplinary parent holding us back and keeping us in our place. Think of these thoughts as being like the parasites that keep you in bed when you’re sick with the flu. Don’t listen to these attacks when they tell you not to pursue your goals or to for…
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…et it’s a widely accepted thing to do. In Compassionate Child-Rearing, Dr. Robert Firestone discusses something he refers to as the implicit pain of sensitive child-rearing. Raising children with the emotional bonding they need—sensitivity, empathy and compassion—requires the parent to be open and vulnerable, willing to feel the child’s emotional states, (the pleasurable and the painful) as well as their own. To be tuned in to their child’s pain a…
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…motional distance,” wrote psychologist and author of The Fantasy Bond, Dr. Robert Firestone on his PsychAlive blog. What is a Fantasy Bond? The fantasy bond exists when the reality of a deep, loving feeling is replaced by a more robotic form of going through the motions of an intimate relationship. Many factors including childhood experiences, the repeating of past patterns and a fear of being alone can drive people to a fantasy bond. As children,…
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