In this blog, I am excited to share the introduction and conclusion from my new book, Challenging the Fantasy Bond. I hope you find it interesting and enjoy reading it. The Fantasy Bond The early version of my theoretical approach set forth in The Fantasy Bond was primarily intended for psychologists, psychiatrists and others in… Read more »
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The ultimate tragedy of the human condition is our awareness of our inevitable mortality. Each person is born with a death sentence. The developing child initially discovers the traumatic reality that their parents will die and later that they themselves will eventually die. This reality is too terrifying to tolerate, so the child must resort… Read more »
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One of the most significant contributions of my theoretical approach, Separation Theory, is that it offers an understanding of the core dynamics underlying human aggression. It explains how people’s defensive nature and dependency on fantasy bonds polarize them against others with different customs and beliefs. In a similar vein, Schneider’s (2013) concept of “psychological polarization” describes the elevation of one… Read more »
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Separation Theory integrates psychoanalytic and existential systems of thought by showing how early interpersonal pain, and separation anxiety and later death anxiety lead to the development of powerful psychological defenses. These defenses attempt to cope with and minimize painful experiences and emotions suffered in one’s developmental years but later predispose limitations and maladaptation in adult… Read more »
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Both glamorizing and demonizing violence help us avoid having to understand the violent mind. We should enter the violent person’s subjective world, not just in order to be able to offer treatment, but also to anticipate the nature of the risks they embody both to themselves and to society. ~ Peter Fonagy, “Towards a Developmental… Read more »
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Suicide is a tragic ending to life that, in many cases, can be averted. It constitutes a public health problem of considerable magnitude in the United States, occurring at nearly twice the rate as that of homicide. From 1999 to 2016, suicide rates have steadily risen in nearly every state in the union. Understanding this seemingly perverse anti-life behavior… Read more »
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To be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, day and night, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~ e.e. cummings Each individual faces a struggle against powerful odds to retain a unique selfhood and personal… Read more »
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In my last blog, I described the “voice” as a series of negative thoughts and attitudes toward self and others, which are at the core of a person’s self-destructive ideology and behavior. As such, the voice can be conceived of as the internal enemy or anti-self aspect of the personality. My approach to psychotherapy is… Read more »
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Death anxiety encompasses a broad spectrum of emotions ranging from a few passing moments of fear to a complete state of panic. In either case, the experience is painful on a feeling level or, at its worst, terrifying. For this reason, most people find a way to obliterate images of death’s finality from their conscious… Read more »
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Faced with the painful awareness of death’s finality, individuals try to recreate a parent or parents in other people, groups, or institutions, or they search for a personal savior on earth or in the heavens. Just as the imagined merger with one’s family once provided its members with an illusion of immortality, group identification offers… Read more »
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